I am a parent of a sexual abuse survivor. I’m also an SBC pastor. I can’t really say more because after years the case is going to trial in the days ahead. Our kiddo is an “on her own” adult now. We’ve been through a lot over the years. I have thoughts in light of #SBC #SBCtoo and the debate regarding the sufficiency of Scripture and trauma therapy.
The impact of sexual abuse/assault is hellish. Its worst impact is on the survivor but it is wrecking to everyone who loves the survivor.
The trauma has so many ripple effects. My wife and I often found ourselves in the fetal position, weeping, and at a total loss for what to do and how to help.
I found the Scripture to be sufficient. Personally in all of it the Psalms ministered deeply to me. For all that she went through our daughter held and holds tightly to the Scripture. Many times through the years, I got up early and she was already sitting at the table with a cup of coffee, Bible open, and feverishly writing in her journal. God met her and us regularly in the wilderness of sexual trauma.
It’s been war honestly. As we prayed God led us to people who could help. We needed all kinds of help. Legal help. The legal battle is real. Spiritual help. The spiritual warfare around sexual trauma is intense. We needed mental health help. We met a trauma informed LPC who loved Jesus, applied the Scriptures and incorporated intercessory prayer in her practice. She is also professionally trained using techniques like EMDR and cognitive behavioral therapy to help. She helped us know when medicine would be appropriate. This is the common grace given by our Creator.
I am my daughter’s father but as I said I’m also a pastor. Our church has a vibrant Biblical counseling ministry run by highly trained biblical counselors. We are today seeing upwards of 70 “clients” through that ministry.
Our church is also starting a counseling center in our community run by LPC’s using an integrated approach which will launch in the 4th quarter of 2022. All of our LPC’s will believe Jesus is enough and the Scripture is sufficient. They also will have been highly trained to bring healing to trauma using practical approaches based in psychology and theology, in Jesus name.
For all those in the SBC screaming “Scripture is sufficient” for treating sexual trauma, you are right and wrong. Right in the sense that foundationally, everything we need is in the Scripture. Wrong in that the Scripture doesn’t prohibit common graces like medical care, mental health care, legal assistance, etc.
Pushing against Christian based trauma therapy for traumatized people in the name of “the sufficiency of Scripture” is in fact infuriating from my chair as a pastor who upholds the inerrancy of Scripture and the sufficiency of Scripture and as a parent of a daughter who is a sexual abuse survivor.
Hold up the Scriptures. Fix your eyes on Jesus. Rely on the Holy Spirit. Yes, yes, yes. But please, don’t deny people the common grace of informed trauma therapy as a pathway for healing.
Brian Haynes 
THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!! My daughter was sexually abused by her uncle who claimed to be a Pastor….. he began grooming her(all of us) when she was 2, with abuse beginning around age 8…. She told us at age 14. She is now 24….STRUGGLING!!!! I watched her cling to Gods word… but, now I’ve watched a volcano erupt!!! She has walked away… my husband and I are heartbroken… the past year has been very dark for us all…. I have researched Complex Trauma… I just wish someone would have explained all of this to us…. I tried to explain to my Church family (a very small SBC Church) Complex Trauma and the effects…. Trying to explain how to pray for her… I tried to explain the horrific abuse, the battle my daughter faces daily… etc… I was told you cannot combine Christianity, the Bible snd Psychology… my response was how can we not… if we don’t… these broken victims will be flooding to crazy Psychologist… if they are being treated by Christian Psychologists… victims will receive COMPLETE healing…. I was told I needed to find a Church I could be happier in… and that I was falling into false doctrine. My Soul was crushed!! This has sent me spiraling into the DARKEST place I have ever been… I literally crawled into my husband’s lap and wished I were dead…. But, Jesus met me there… and little by little HE is pulling me out of the dark…. My daughter is in a very abusive relationship… she didn’t speak to us for a while… but, I chose to love her unconditionally… meet her where she is…. We now have our relationship back with her… she has no idea what my former Pastors wife said to me… if she ever found out.. I’m not sure she would ever return… to Christ… she is a Christian but, a very deeply Soul bruised baby… you see my pastor’s wife told me she was acting in total rebellion… that I could not blame the abuser for her choices now… on and on… but, if we take a moment to understand the brain… this horrific abuse affects victims so much deeper than we can understand…. So again thank you!!!! I have been in that fetal position many times… I just don’t think people really understand…. Thank you so much! Christie
LikeLike
Thanks for sharing all of this. Rest assured our family will pray for yours!
LikeLike
Oh Christie,
How heartbreaking. We are in a similar situation. Our daughter was sexually abused by my nephew for over 10 years; it came out when she was 18. She’s now 20 and it has been like an explosion. She’s not doing well. I wish there were groups for supporters of survivors. We’ve been desperate to meet with others who understand and can empathize. Bryan, we heard your message on the Visionary Family podcast and so appreciated how you explained what it feels like as a family. It’s heartbreaking and awful.
LikeLike
We need you in zambia too.
IAM pastor steward kasanzhi in zambia we are rehabilitate the inmates and drug addict.
LikeLike